The Narcissist will intentionally discard you at the worst possible time in your life. This discard will take place during unfortunate life situations such as losing a job, a loved one, or after receiving a negative diagnosis.
The idea of becoming free from a Narcissistically Abusive relationship but agreeing to be friends is a quite complex decision to make.
If you have dated a narcissist for any length of time, you are definitely aware of their fascination with sabotaging holidays, birthdays, graduations, you name it. Whatever the event, I’m sure their footprint of misery supersedes the memory. Whether it’s the disappearing act, the sudden argument or the silent treatment, the narcissist is determined to steal the joy out of any celebratory event. And they will continue to do so, year after year…after year. The bigger the event or holiday, the better. So with that being said, it’s no wonder why Christmas is the opportune time for the narcissist’s dark side to be on display. The narcissist has absolutely no problem bringing the joy of Christmas to a halt and redirecting all attention onto themselves. That’s what the Grinch-like behavior is all about, stealing your joy and gaining your attention. The narcissist hates to see anyone truly happy because it reminds them of their misery which is unbearable. So in order to get relief from their own miserable selves, the narcissist will project their misery …
For the Spiritual Narcissist, targeting the women of God is a great source of Narcissistic supply. Many women of God become easy prey, falling in love with the image of a mighty man of God who is actually a wolf in sheep clothing. The question that plagues us is “how do they do it”.
Simply put, there are no two ways about it. Dealing with a Narcissist is sticky business. The onslaught of emotional abuse, confusion and outright chaos is more than anyone could ever imagine. Walking through the complexities of a Narcissistic relationship is like walking through a landmine. The uncertainty of knowing what to expect or when the next emotional explosion (Narcissistic Rage) is coming can eventually become quite exasperating.
Walking away from those that we care for is never an easy task. Especially if we are uncertain as to how we ended up here in the first place. I know first hand that this can be a very uncomfortable position to be in, so let me first commend you for taking a stand for the betterment of YOU! Secondly, it is imperative to come face to face with the truth about the relationship and why no contact (NC) is necessary. Accepting this truth will help if you become tempted to open the door for the Narcissist once they begin hoovering after you implement NC.
Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic that is best described in these deceptively phrased statements; “Are you crazy?” “That didn’t happen” and “You imagined it.” Gaslighting is extremely dangerous as it distorts and erodes the victims sense of reality; diminishes their self-trust and causes them to feel unjustified in shining a light on the mistreatment and calling it what it is…abuse!